“So what’s she like?”
I look at your profile while you dismiss my eye contact. I see the way that you look at her with your eyes wide and hopeful. You’re imagining her through the reflection of the rain looking back at you like a mirror. Even though she isn’t there, you speak with such truth and desire knowing that you don’t have the confidence to say this to her; but to me, I’m nothing more than a friend.
“She has beautiful hazel eyes. Did you know about 5% of the population have hazel eyes? And she’s one of them!”
Mine are brown. Dark brown – practically indistinguishable from the pupil. I notice your brown eyes and find them wonderful. Did you know that people with brown eyes have a lower risk of type 1 diabetes than those with lighter eyes? I listen and, by obligation, agree with you hiding the fact that every compliment is a feature that I wish I had – features that you find pretty.
“That’s adorable! Has she said or done anything that would make you think she likes you?”
What are the things that I need to say to you? What are compliments that stuck out to you that you noted? I am only asking because I’m a pair of ears that translates her actions and words to fit your slang. I want to know so I can help you understand.
“Well, uhh, at the carnival, she complimented my hair and said I smelled nice. And…”
Nice hair and smells nice, noted. The carnival – the one I was telling you about. The one where you said you couldn’t go with me because you were ‘busy’.
“I- I mean, if she took the time to sniff you then yeah she is DEFINATELY interested.”
Not worth bringing it up. I already lost.
“…then she kissed me.”
Oh.
“Oh!”
“Ah, she texted me to meet me at the cafe!”
You’re just going to leave me?
“Finally, I was trying to finding a way to get rid of you.”
“You sure?”
Stay.
“Go!”
“I’ll tell you about how it goes tomorrow. You’re the best.”
And just like that, I’m your second choice. First place goes to the girl and claiming second – me.
Dear Hadlen,
I really enjoyed your piece, as it was so intriguing and flowed flawlessly. I found myself hanging onto every word, curious to know more. The way you structured your piece was brilliant, I especially loved how you differentiated each dialogue, as it made the piece look so pleasing. The line I personally enjoyed the most was, “you’re just going to leave me?” As it effectively described all of the main character’s feelings with just a few simple words. It hit hard, in all the best ways.
For improvements, I can’t think of anything as your writing already seems so flawless. Your style is so unique, and so enjoyable to read.
This piece was amazing, and I hope I get to read your future pieces!
Sincerely, Amulya
Dear Amulya,
Thank you so much for taking the time to read my work. Seeing what you did for this assignment, I really appreciate your comment as your work was amazing. With that line that you mentioned, I was trying to do exactly that – high emotions with little words. I am happy that that translated for you.
Sincerely,
Hadlen